


Balance is Born

by ELISE_ELEVEN



Category: Star Wars - All Media Types, Star Wars Sequel Trilogy
Genre: Action/Adventure, Angst, Betrayal, Enemies to Lovers, Eventual Smut, F/M, Fate & Destiny, First Kiss, First Time, Fluff, Fluff and Angst, Fluff and Smut, Force Bond (Star Wars), Force Ghosts, Force Training, Force Use, Force Visions, Friendship, Hate to Love, Jedi Mind Trick, Making Love, Mild Smut, Post-Star Wars: The Last Jedi, Rescue Missions, Resistance, Romance, Secret Relationship, Secrets, Sex, Sexy Times, Smut, The Dark Side of the Force, The Force, The Force Ships It, Tragic Romance
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-06-29
Updated: 2018-08-11
Packaged: 2019-05-30 12:12:15
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 5
Words: 14,141
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15096452
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ELISE_ELEVEN/pseuds/ELISE_ELEVEN
Summary: Rey knows she should have told everyone the truth about what happened on the Island. She should have told them what really happened at the death of Supreme Leader Snoke. She should have told her friends what had happened between her and Kylo Ren, but they wouldn't understand. She doesn't even understand herself.Several Months after the Battle on Crait, Rey finds herself facing the end of the war. Either the First Order will fall or the Resistance will. She has banished from her mind the inevitability of her confrontation with the new Supreme Leader, Kylo Ren. Rey has been trying to fend off the Force's attempts to connect them, but she knows they will have to face each other eventually. Either Kylo Ren will fall or she will. And this scares her most of all.





	1. Chapter One

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Her pulse quickens as adrenaline ignites her courage and strength that will carry her through the battle. Drawing her lightsaber, she glances over her shoulder, and her heart pauses in beating, breath halts in her windpipe. It’s Kylo Ren, mask-less, standing beside his ship on the incline before the village. His hair curling around his ears and cape flapping in the wind he looks sinister and striking. Rey is frozen at the sight of him. She had not expected him to come on a small mission like this one, just brood in his command base, where she assumed he had been every time they had spoken over the past couple of months. 
> 
> Is this a trap?

Kylo Ren’s dark cape flaps in the wind that flows from to south of a planet called Redement where are rumored to be support the Resistance. He has flown three of his best transport ships down to this planet of golden soil and black half burned trees, with a force of stormtroopers forty strong. There villagers no doubt know where the remnant of the resistance is hiding from his iron grasp, or at least that is what he told himself and General Hux. Hux obeyed his orders without question, he had since Kylo became the Supreme Leader, this must mean that Hux has no reservations about what happened that night Snoke died. Or perhaps he knows and is only biding his time until he can gather support among the rest of the First Order. This must never happen. Kylo clenches his fist in thought of that week and useless man who he is forced to spend most of his time with, Hux always watching him. Kylo must remember to do the same to him. 

With a nod from Kylo, Hux marches his men into the village where they had strict orders to do everything they must to extract any information they have. Even though he knows these villagers cannot know anything of value, he constantly feels the eyes of Hux and the other commanders constantly on him, expecting him to have the answers and anticipating his failures. Kylo only ordered this mission to distract them and himself. They, the remnant resistance is now such a small number that they are able to hide without any trace. Perhaps his heart is not in it, but his plans, the only ones he had, have been put on hold with Rey’s continued refusal to see reason or even try to grasp the great plans he has for them. 

“Everyone in position?”, Rey whispers into her portable coms unit. After a beat Finn’s voice answers from the other side of the village.

“Affirmative. We’re all ready.” 

“Good luck to you then”, she hopes the smile in her voice expresses all the words they don’t have time to exchange, a temporary goodbye incase the worse to happen to either of them. 

Rey quickly clicks off her radio as a small cluster of stormtroopers passes just on the other side of the hut made from charred black wood where she is hiding. Luckily the small band of Resistance soldiers, including Rey, Finn, and Chewy, where on a nearby planet when the alarm was sounded when the First Order ships were seen nearing Redement. Under cover, twenty men and women snuck into the village disguised as natives, in order to attack the stormtroopers one by one before they realized there were enemies with weapons among them. With their limited numbers and resources, this was the best the Resistance could, protect those who they could and take out small pockets of First Order troupes when they could. 

Pressed against the wall, Rey takes a deep breath, preparing to enter the fight. Her pulse quickens as adrenaline ignites her courage and strength that will carry her through the battle. Drawing her lightsaber, she glances over her shoulder, and her heart pauses in beating, breath halts in her windpipe. It’s Kylo Ren, mask-less, standing beside his ship on the incline before the village. His hair curling around his ears and cape flapping in the wind he looks sinister and striking. Rey is frozen at the sight of him. She had not expected him to come on a small mission like this one, just brood in his command base, where she assumed he had been every time they had spoken over the past couple of months. 

Is this a trap? Is there something bigger happening here? She is shaken out of her moment by blaster fire that bursts out somewhere in the village. Her crew had gone undercover with only simple weapons and silenced blasters to be as discrete as possible, so the stormtroopers had discovered the resistance. Kylo’s body turns ridged at the noise and even at this distance Rey sees his gloved fists clench in anger. Abruptly his head turns in her in her direction. Rey inhales sharply, thinking he has seen her but he has noticed something else.

“Of course”, Kylo mumbles under his breath, they would turn up here where I wasn’t expecting to find anything. He considers joining the fight, some excitement for his action-less past month. But, movement at the edge of the village on his right catches his eye. A group of maybe a dozen villagers trying to slither away from the fight are making a dash across the clearing and into the forest of six feet tall, burnt looking trees. Of course Hux didn’t notice, Kylo thinks, I’ll capture them and confront him. Hux will be humiliated in front of his men. Without hesitation Kylo purposefully strides across the shimmering dust of the planet that plumes up around his swirling cape. He won’t even need to use his lightsaber for this, just the force will suffice. Maybe he’ll use it anyway to get an even better reaction.  
Cresting the top of the hill, Kylo is almost upon the deserters now. One of them, a young man with a dirty face, turns just in time to see Kylo approaching. He cries out and urges his forward his comrades, who each in turn see Kylo and then run for their lives. This is too easy, Kylo thinks, allowing himself to smile briefly. 

“Stop. Kylo.” This voice halts Ren in his tracks and consumes his mind. Despite the constant gunfire and explosions, he hears it as clearly as if from one of their force visions, close as a heartbeat. But he knows she is here in person. He can feel her presence. 

Rey plants her feet on the edge of the plateau at the top of the hill, just a few feet behind Kylo. She doesn’t need to repeat herself, he heard her the first time, she knows it. Slowly Kylo’s back straightens. “Rey.” His dark voice is more gentle that she expected, than she remembered. She swallows and waits as Kylo turns to face her, sliding his saber from his belt. He doesn’t point it at her but holds it ready at his side. Rey can’t help glancing over his form quickly. She’s forgotten what it was like to be with him in person, the presence he possesses. 

Kylo’s eyes lock on Rey’s. Some small part deep inside him aches slightly at the sight of her. But his brain reminds him of their last force conversation when she has said she was done. “We can’t go on like this, I can’t. We can’t keep meeting like this if we can’t get anywhere. If you’ve made your decision, then it’s time to stop.  
He had just shaken his head at that. “It’s you who won’t even listen to what I’m saying. You refuse anything I suggest!”  
At that she screamed, “Just stop! Leave me alone!” And the connection had broken not to form again. That had been three weeks ago and the couple times he had tried to reconnect had failed. 

They stand facing each other, each waiting for the other to break the silence. So much had passed between them the last time they spoke there seems to be nothing to say. The wind whips up and Kylo’s hair blows into his face, one dark lock covering his right eye and part of his scar. “Rey.” He repeats and takes a step closer to her. Rey’s heart jumps. No. She had promised herself that the next time they met she would show him no more mercy. It was over, this strange connection they had accidently forged, that she hadn’t been wise enough to clip before now. Rey resists the pull his eyes have on her, and instead of stepping forward to meet him, she draws her own saber and ignites it in one motion, holding it between them. 

Kylo doesn’t seem surprised by this and he doesn’t even flinch, but the crease in his forehead deepens as his eyebrows come together. He considers her fixed expression for a moment and then brandishes his own saber, the red light casting a glow on his pale face. 

Rey strikes first but Kylo effortlessly blocks and strikes back. Aggressively Rey hits blow after blow pushing Kylo back from the hill’s edge and toward the forest of short trees. As he strikes and blocks, Kylo begins to feel the warmth he hadn’t felt in weeks spread through his limbs and into his chest. It’s something about being this close to her, maybe the breath he occasionally feels on his hand. It must be the strength and power resonating through her, the glow of a sun that lives behind her narrowed eyes. Kylo lets out a breath of all the built up tension from his body, and even chuckles as he nearly slips in the dusty soil, but regains his footing lands three blows in a row, pushing Rey backward. She narrows her eyes, grunts, and drives back even harder in response. 

They dance across the table top hill overlooking the fight in the town below. Kylo and Rey are both sweating and the dust kicked up by their circling floats up and sticks to their faces, hair and clothes. Their faces sparkle in the light from the golden powder. Rey fakes a strike at his shoulder and slashes a line through his cape and grazes the side of his right leg, leaving a strip of skin and blood exposed. Kylo laughs again, unable to resist the life flowing through him, life he missed. They lock blades, the effort drawing them close enough to exchange breaths. Rey shakes her head at him as they lock eyes, a smile to match his pulling on the corners of her mouth. Using the force to shove him backward into the air, Rey shakes her head again. Stop letting him in your head, she growls to herself. 

He’s rising up a moment after he hits the ground and Rey is there to meet him. He twists and spins to avoid the wide arch of her slash and stands to block her next hit. They circle each other, breathing hard, neither able to avoid a smile. 

Suddenly something lands in the dirt at the edge of the hilltop right behind Kylo. Before either one has a chance to cast it a glance, there is an explosion. Light, metal, and gold dust mix and throw the two of them off their feet and into the ground feet away. Their bodies’ impact causes a huge dust cloud to explode. When Rey opens her eyes again, Kylo’s eyes are only inches away from hers. His body is a warm pressure on top of her own. Her breath catches at his closeness and then releases because her pulse is racing to hard. His breaths match hers. His hair hangs down in a curtain around his face and a stray hair tickles her cheek. Rey’s eyes snag on his thick lashes before sweeping across his face, pausing only a moment to long on his lip before meeting his eyes. His gaze is strong and raw with emotion and would have stolen her breath if his closeness hadn't already. 

“Rey”, he whispers, curious eyes on her lips then on her own gaze. Without hesitation she slowly brings a hand up to touch the scar across the side of his face. Her fingers rest on the stubble on his cheek and the grove she, herself, made in his skin. Wonder at the way she's feeling is coursing through her. 

“Ben.” 

It’s only barely above a whisper, but he hears it perfectly and it ignites a light in his eyes. Ben’s face dips towards hers and she lifts her chin to meet him. Their lips connect with an electricity stronger than the force. Amidst the smoke and dust and heat he kisses her gently, slowly and she kisses him back. 

A few heartbeats go by in an everlasting minute when shouts and more nearby explosions shake them from their moment and they break apart. They lock eyes for a second before scrambling to their feet. Before Rey knows what is happening Ben has bent to pick up the lightsabers that have fallen side by side just feet away. Fear prickles on her skin for a second as he turns to face her with both sabers in hand. Then it passes when he stretches out to hand her the saber. Their fingers touch for a moment. 

More shouts and when Rey turns she sees Finn, yelling her name and several others starting to race up the hill. There are no living stormtroopers in sight. When she turns back to Kylo, he is watching her waiting for her to make the first move. It’s her choice and she makes it without hesitation. “Run!” 

He seems surprised, “What?”

“Ben, run. Get out of here!” Kylo hesitates, fixing his eyes to hers, and then takes off at sprint into the forest. 

“Rey!” Finn is nearly choking on the word as he crests the hill to find her lying on her side in the dirt. She doesn’t need to fake a pant or bewildered expression as he hits the ground hard as he kneels beside her. “Are you ok? Rey?” 

“I’m alright, Finn.” She says as she uses his shoulder to shakily get to her feet. The explosion shot shrapnel into her exposed right arm and she winces at the unexpected pain and blood. Finn sees her injury and stoops to examine it. 

“Oh man! You’re hurt. Come on, let’s get you back to the ship.” Finn carefully wraps Rey’s left arm around his shoulders to help support her, then glances over his shoulder in the direction Kylo Ren had just retreated. “What happened? It looked like you had him and then he just ran away. Why would he do that?” 

“I don’t know.” Rey keeps her eyes straight ahead as Finn helps her down the incline. “I thought I had him too, but then he used to force to overpower me. Then he heard you coming and ran away.” 

Finn frowns pressing his lips into a tight line. “What did he do to you? I mean how did he overpower you?” 

“He did something that I’ve never seen before, with the force. He sort or pinned me to the ground and it was like I was frozen in carbonite.” Rey tries to keep her voice steady and still avoids looking Finn in the eye. 

He grunts and shakes his head angerly. “That murderous snake! He wouldn’t even stand his ground, just ran away. Coward!” Rey just nods silently keeping her eyes on the path before them. “Somebody needs put a lightsaber through that guy. I wish I had gotten a chance to face him again. Why is it that you always get to fight him, I mean it’s my turn, right? Well if I get a chance I’ll do whatever it takes to rid us of that menace. I won’t even hesitate. I mean, even if he is Leia’s son, I’ll do what I have to.” 

“Maybe you’re right.” Finn helps Rey sit down inside the small cargo ship they had brought. She looks outside and watches the natives carry away dead stormtrooper bodies from their streets. It was easy to forget stormtroopers were real people while they were marching toward you, each the same as the other. They look so much more human in death. As a villager drags away a bloody stormtrooper, his helmet slips off to reveal a face, charred and raw in death. Rey has to look away, eyebrows creasing. Finn studies her face for a moment before glancing to see what has upset her. 

“War is a messy thing.” 

“That could have been you. One of them could be in your place.” 

Finn nods solemnly. “I guess so. I wish they all were able to do what I did.” 

Rey watches his face as he gathers gauze to clean the blood dripping slowly down her arm. She feels a pang of affection for him in his kindness and his protectiveness for her. For the first time she meets his gaze when he looks up at her. “I glad that isn’t you.” Finn just smiles, nods, and squeezes her arm.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you to everyone for reading.  
> I have been in love with Kylo/Ben and Rey and their relationship ever since I first saw The Last Jedi. I cannot wait for Episode 9 and just have to know what happens. For now I get to make up my own version, so you can be sure it will be full of beautiful Reylo moments.  
> Please let me know what you thought and what you liked.


	2. Chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> “Well, thank you for telling me. A strange set of events have occurred today. We’ll have talk about it more later.” Leia stiffly rises from her seat and turns to go.
> 
> As soon as her back is turned, Rey lets out a big breath of air. Was it actually right to lie to everyone about this, about everything that had happened during her time on this island and aboard Snoke’s ship? But then it would be impossible to explain everything now, not when she’d been keeping things to herself for this long. They would never understand. They wouldn’t have understood even in the beginning.

Back on a nearby planet where a hastily set up Resistance base has been constructed, Rey has the shrapnel extracted from her arm. As soon as the nurse has wrapped up the injury and left her alone, Rey sighs and drops her head in her palms. What happened? She thinks, shaking her head in disbelief. What happened today? But even now she can still feel Ben’s scar beneath her fingertip and the pressure of his lips, the softness of his hair as it brushed his forehead. A blush creeps across her entire face. “What happened”, she mumbles into her fingers. 

A hand on her shoulder startles her out of contemplation and she jerks upright, head snapping to her left where General Leia as just joined her on the bench. “That’s what I was wondering.” 

Rey tries very hard not to blush again and act natural. “What did you say? Sorry.”

“I’m told my son was there today. And that you fought him, again.”

“Right. I hadn’t expected him to even be there. He was chasing after some villagers who were trying to escape so I went after him.” She finds it even harder lying to Leia than to Finn but tries to look her in the eye. 

General Leia’s gaze wanders to somewhere in the distance. “Neither did I.” She looks Rey in the eye with a quizzical look on her face. “He used some force trick on you that you had never see before and then ran away? Is that right?” 

Rey paused only a moment before saying carefully, “Yes. That’s right” 

The wrinkles in her forehead deepen as Leia frowns. “I don’t pretend to still understand my son. It seems everyday he is growing farther and farther beyond my reach. I just question if there is still some hope left for him.”

Rey squeezes Leia’s hand, wanting so badly to comfort her, to reassure her of the other side of him she has found. “I think I saw something different in him today.”

Leia’s eyebrows lift in surprise. “Really? What do you mean?” 

“He was just different. I can’t really explain it.”

Leia’s frown deepens. 

“He was- when he spoke he seemed less angry and more confused or- curious. It’s hard to describe, but he was different. His mannerisms weren’t so harsh or nasty.”   
“Well, thank you for telling me. A strange set of events have occurred today. We’ll have talk about it more later.” Leia stiffly rises from her seat and turns to go.  
As soon as her back is turned, Rey lets out a big breath of air. Was it actually right to lie to everyone about this, about everything that had happened during her time on this island and aboard Snoke’s ship? But then it would be impossible to explain everything now, not when she’d been keeping things to herself for this long. They would never understand. They wouldn’t have understood even in the beginning. 

That evening after having dinner with Poe, Finn, and a few of their Resistance friends and a relaxing evening glancing through some of the Jedi texts, Rey lies in bed contemplating the days events and trying to make sense of them. Kylo, or should she call him Ben now, who ever was he to her now, had kissed her and she had wanted him to.

That didn’t make any sense in Rey’s mind. Sure, there had been those moments, safe and secluded on the island, where they had connected and found common ground, and she had felt things for him that were difficult to understand, but that should have ended after the way he behaved on Crait and his ferocity at her refusal. She should not be able to care for him after she saw the things he could and would do in the face of revenge, the person he was. Maybe he had always been that person, that angry and vengeful and insane person, and her feelings of compassion had just obscured all that from her view. But the tenderness in which he had kissed her and timidness when they barely touched hands that night on the island, the kindness magnified in his voice when he spoke her name, was conflicting with everything else she knew him to be. 

Rey is overcome with the stress of the day and is just drifting off, eyes half closed, and cheeks warmed, when suddenly there is a presence in the room with her. Her ears prick up at a breath and it seems that all her senses are fixed on an area on just the other side of the room. Rey’s first instinct is to throw her eyelids open and call her saber, which is on a nearby table, to her and confront the intruder. But then in the next moment she recalls the familiarity of this feeling and knows right away who is trespassing in her room. Without moving a muscle, she widens the slits in her eyelids just enough to see that Ben Solo is standing across from her, at the end of the bed. He’s wearing an off-white cotton tunic and black pants, suggesting he may have been in the middle of dressing for bed. His back is all she can see, but a moment later she notices his shoulders tense before slowly turning to face her. 

Rey’s heart pounds at the sight of him, because of their moment that afternoon and also because she has never seen him so look so causal and relaxed. His hair is askew, he’s not wearing gloves, and he’s barefoot. She should probably sit up tell him leave- or to stay. Or maybe if she just pretends to be asleep he will go away on his own. 

Ben frowns for a second but then comes to realize that she’s just sleeping. She must look strange floating on her back in midair. He comes around the bed to stand beside her and trains his eyes on her face. He stretches out a hand to touch her, to wake her, but then seems to change his mind and it falls at his side. Ben exhales in a soft sigh and then turns to walk back to the other side of the empty room where he sags into a sitting position with his back to her. He must be sitting on a chair or bed where ever he is, but Ben looks like he is hovering midair. It does look strange. He’s giving her privacy, she realizes. 

Rey allows her eyes to open all the way and watches as Ben, his back to her, picks up something small in his right hand and begins to move it back in forth at chest height. Is he writing? What might he be writing and why? He could just use the unlimited technology he has at his fingertips to record information. She continues to watch him and the longer she gazes the more her heart goes out to him. Maybe Rey should get up and go to him now. What would it hurt? And soon it’s all she wants to do. She’ll walk across the room and place her hands on the curve of his shoulder, feel the relaxed muscles underneath the course fabric of his tunic. She wants to know if it’s rough or soft and what it would feel like to run her fingers through the thick locks of dark hair at the nape of his neck. 

Rey is on the verge of rising from her bed and going to him there and then without any more hesitation when she notices that Ben’s hand has stopped moving and his head has risen. A second later, he turns his head and sees that she is starring at him. They lock eyes, Ben’s eyebrows creased, and his mouth open slightly. His lips part as if to say her name, but before he can get a word out, Ben suddenly disappears and their connection has broken. 

He must have heard me breathing unnaturally and realized I wasn’t asleep, she thinks. How long did he know? Was he aware that she had been awake the whole time and had pretended to be asleep just to avoid him? She was suddenly filled with a tiny ping of shame and remorse. I doesn’t matter, she tells herself, it wasn’t going to work out anyway. Better to have stopped it now and let us go our separate ways. But Rey knows that no matter how far they drift, she will have to face him at some point. When it comes down to the final battle, only one of them will be able to walk away.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> One of my favorite things in The Last Jedi is the force bond. It's so much fun to read about in other fanfiction and to play around with myself.   
> Expect more of that to come.   
> Thanks for reading. Please let me know what you thought and what you liked.


	3. Chapter 3

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> .” Rey translates his rough tones in her head until she understands their meaning. Chewie takes a long pause before adding; “I do agree with you though. She does appear to have some secrets.” 
> 
> Rey is still recovering form the conversation she’d just overheard when she rounds the falcon and joins them. Immediately Chewbacca rushes forward to scoop her into a hug. She asks him about his journey, but as her tells her a story about R2 having to detach some sort of power cell from another ship, her attention drifts to Leia’s face. Her features are pleasant and collected but she doesn’t look Rey quite in the eye.

Rey’s muscles stiffen when she spots Rose Tico sitting across from Finn at their usual table in the meal hall. She squraes her shoulders telling herself no to be juvenile, that it is not a big deal. Poe grins as he notices her and cocks his head to her to sit beside him. Rey has been trying not to avoid Rose ever since the moment when she first saw her on the falcon. It’s not that she doesn’t like Rose, it’s just that she doesn’t know her, doesn’t trust her, doesn’t understand this tentative connection she sees blooming between her and Finn. Finn is the first real friend she ever had so she wants to protect him from getting hurt. She also wants to protect their strong friendship so she tries not to let her discomfort show. 

As she plants herself down beside Poe, Finn immediately pauses in his conversation to ask about her arm. She waves him off, saying its fine, although it had taken considerable effort to drag herself out of bed the next morning. Between fight yesterday and the surprise visit last night, she couldn’t quiet her mind and sleep. Finn had been in the middle of telling Rose and Poe a story during his time as a stormtrooper. Usually he doesn’t like to talk about that time of his life, so Rey perks up hear ears to listen as he finishes. Though she can’t keep herself from diving into her breakfast of Lei Grain sticks slathered in fruit sauce and sprinkled with chopped Oawt Nuts. 

“So, the droid started malfunctioning in the shower water. It chased him and three other guys out of the washroom and started shocking them with it’s prong. They were running around the room naked, screaming at the top of their lungs.” Finn pauses to wheeze with laughter. “All the rest of up climbed up on our bunks and were laughing our asses off. Fn-3666 hit his head on the corner of one of the bunks and fell, SPLAT, down on his face. He just lay there in the middle of the floor while the other two kept jumping over him while that crazy droid kept beeping and zapping them.” 

At this point in the story Poe is doubled over in laughter and Rose has tears coming out the corners of her eyes. Rey nearly spits out her mouthful of food as a fit of laughter quakes through her chest. Finn is grinning at them from ear to ear. “So just when we thought it couldn’t get any better, the door to the barracks whooshes open and there stands Captain Phasma herself!”

Rose gripps her side as she throws her head back and howls. “No way!” Rey exclaims as Poe guffaws. Finn fights to catch his breath and continue. 

“She just stands there in the doorway, like frozen in horror as she takes in the scene. Of course she had her helmet on so we couldn’t see her face, but I would sure have liked to. The two naked guys didn’t notice Phasma was there until one of them almost ran into her. He was so startled that he changed direction so quickly but he stumbled backwards over Fn-36 and fell down beside him. The third guy stopped in his tracks, came to attention, and he tried to hold it together while the droid just kept shocking him. So, like in one motion Phasma whips out her blaster and shoots the droid in the head. Then she holsters it again and looks right at Fn-36 who is just waking up and finally sees her. She says, “Fn-3666, didn’t I tell you not to remove that helmet?” Then before he can answer, that sassy Chrome Dome whirls around and struts right out of there.” 

It takes several moments for the three of them to regain their composure and Finn has to get up and help Rose back onto the bench after she slid off in a fit of hysteria. “Ahhh”, Poe lets out a long breath, “I wouldn’t have thought Troopers were capable of laughter before I met you.” 

“Oh I have stories that are so much worse. I’ll have to tell you those later.” Finn glances back and forth between Rose and Rey and Poe nods knowingly. Suddenly he glances at the clock and then shoots out of his seat. “We’re late for that meeting with Leia!” 

Finn goes rigid, face blank, then smacks his forehead. Both Finn and Poe race out of the hall at top speed, leaving Rey and Rose alone. They spend an uncomfortable few minutes finishing the remainder of their meals. Rey scrapes her plate awkwardly, about to announce that she has something very important to do when Rose looks over at her. “So, you had to fight Kylo Ren again yesterday?” 

Rey responds with a nod. “I can’t imagine that. It must have been really scary when he pulled that trick on you. Good thing you were able to get away. Its kind of strange that he was on that mission. Makes you wonder if there was something big planned, some special operation he had to oversee himself.” 

Rey automatically nods, “Maybe”. But then stops to consider this point. What was he really doing there? Could he have known she would show up? Was he looking for an opportunity to confront her? Her mind flicks back to that moment, lying on the ground, opening her eyes to find his so close. She remembers the exact color and depth, green and brown, luminous under his lashes. 

Rose’s voice pries her back to the moment. “But if anyone knows him, its you. You’re the one who has fought him before. I can’t imagine what that must have been like, racing through the woods for your lives and then running into him.” Finn has most definitely described the experience to her in depth. “Finn is lucky to be alive.”

“He is”, Rey meets her eyes and then looks away. 

“He’s lucky to have you as a friend.” 

Again Rey looks her straight in the face, “We’re all lucky to have HIM.” Again they settle into silence, but it’s more comfortable now somehow. After a moment, she looks up again. “Do you know if Chewie has made it back yet?”

“No, I actually haven’t heard anything, but I think he was supposed to arrive today or tomorrow.”

“I can’t believe he’s been gone for three weeks. I’ve really missed him.”

Rose nods, “Do you think he got that information Leia was looking for?”

“I’m not sure. I have a good feeling he did though.” 

“Yeah.” Rose sighs, “He seems really cool. I mean, when one of you guys translates for me, he’s always really nice.” Rey feels her heart pang. She really did miss him. 

“I think I’ll go and see if I can find him”, she says suddenly, slapping her palms on the table and gathering her dishes.”

“Alright. And Rey?” Rey pauses to look at her. “I know we don’t know eath other very well yet, but I was thinking-. I know you’ve lost a couple mentors lately and I can’t help but notice you seem a bit down lately... It’s just that Poe and Finn have such clear roles here, but you may not feel like you fit in as much or- maybe they just don’t quite get it. Just if you need to talk to another girl, you know like woman to woman or whatever-.” Rose is talking a little too quickly, but it only makes her endearing to Rey, who begins to feel a little guilty for her attitude towards her all this time. “I just want to let you know if you need someone to talk to about like anything, just let me know. She finishes and casts Rey a sincere smile. 

“Thanks Rose.” She smiles back and then leaves in search of her friend. 

As Rey slides into the command center C3-PO looks up from his translation of some text on the main projection console. If a droid can look startled, he does. “Ah, hello Miss Rey. Can I be some assistance?” 

Rey takes a long gaze around the room as several of the other command staff look up from their work. She feels a slight prickle of discomfort at the way their stares fix on her interruption. Leia had introduced her to everyone as a Jedi, Luke’s last apprentice. So, ever since her inclusion into the group at the Resistance, she has felt that the other members have been waiting for her to do something important and useful. The trouble is that Rey is nowhere near the level of a true Jedi and has just spent most of her time pouring over the sacred Jedi texts or leading insignificant missions. Some of them, no doubt, are wondering what the point of her is. 

On the other side of the long room is another smaller room where the staff have their private meetings. Through the windows into the room, Rey sees Poe standing at the head of a long table, leading a some important meeting. Finn stands at his side pointing to the images of three Star Destroyers hovering over the hologram projector. They are both made for this type of thing, especially Poe, who has been thriving at Leia’s side. Whereas she would have no idea how act in a position of command. She’s so proud of both of them. 

“3PO, do you know if Chewie is getting back today?” She turns her eyes back on the golden droid. 

“Ah yes. Our large, furry friend just arrived moments ago and has parked the Millennium Falcon in Hangar Bay 2.” A smile explodes from her lips and she’s racing out the door before C3-PO has time to finish his sentence. His final words follow her as she races down the corridor, “In fact I was on my way to greet him when Miss Luisa here asked me to-.” 

Crossing the hangar bay with quick easy strides, Rey glances between X-wing fighters and transport ships until she spots the Falcon stationed at the end of the row, by the double-wide bay doors. Her heart squeezes with fondness for the old piece of garbage. The ships looks the same at the last time she saw it weeks ago, though it appears that that lose panel on her left side finally fell off after months of Rey commenting on how they should really get it fixed. It has now been replaced with a much cleaner, white square of undented steel. She hopes it didn’t take too much trouble changing the part on the go but wonders where he found a replacement part for an outdated model. Come to think of it, Chewie has told her very little about his destination or the mission he’d been sent on. Rey makes a mental note to ask him about it when she helps him with any other repairs tomorrow. 

Gazing up at the ship, Rey catches the sound of voices drifting over from the other side of the old freighter, on the other side of the landing gear, at the base of the loading ramp. She starts around the side of the ship when she hears her name spoken in Wookie language. Rey freezes in place and listens. “Did he hurt her?” Chewbacca sounds on the verge of anger. 

“No. She said he used this force trick on her and then… just ran away.” Leia’s legs and tall boots are visible to Rey under the belly of the ship and soon the Wookie’s clomp down the ramp before he settles a pile of silver containers onto the ground. He makes a garbled sound in his throat that Rey struggles to translate. “I don’t buy it”, Leia’s voice continues. She Rey was very vague about the whole thing and I keep sensing there is something going on with her. We haven’t really been able to talk about Luke’s passing and she has told me almost nothing about her time on the island. I want to be a help to her, but I feel like she is purposely keeping things from me.”

“Rey has had a lot of things thrust upon her in a short time. It would be hard for anyone to shoulder that much responsibility and pressure.” Rey translates his rough tones in her head until she understands their meaning. Chewie takes a long pause before adding; “I do agree with you though. She does appear to have some secrets.”  
Rey is still recovering form the conversation she’d just overheard when she rounds the falcon and joins them. Immediately Chewbacca rushes forward to scoop her into a hug. She asks him about his journey, but as her tells her a story about R2 having to detach some sort of power cell from another ship, her attention drifts to Leia’s face. Her features are pleasant and collected but she doesn’t look Rey quite in the eye. 

The four of them, R2-D2 rolling along behind, exit the hangar and make their way back to the command hub. 

When they enter the room, they find the command staff hurrying around in a panic. Poe is standing at the main command console attentively listening to a something though an earpiece. Leia pulls straightens to her full height and strides through the sea of officers. “Poe, what’s happening?”

Poe has his hand over the earpiece, pressing it closer, trying to catch every word of the information being relayed to him; his fingers type hurriedly over the his screen as quickly as they can. Concentration furrows his brow. Cellcia, a Ferroan recruit and Poe’s fellow commander, steps in to explain the situation; crisp white hair sways around her waist. “We just received a message from our allies on Zadeeom 2. Two First Order transports loaded with Storm Troopers just landed in the capital city and have they have begun rounding up anyone who is rumored to be associated with the Resistance. The group of new recruits who are hiding with our allies, the ones we were planning to pick up when we get those new X-wings and ammunition from Leestrom and his crew, had to flee.” 

Leia nods in recognition and Cellcia continues, narrowed, golden eyes standing out starkly against her dark blue skin. “Leestrom and Tossi were captured and the others are currently on the run but nowhere in the city is safe. They are requesting we send someone to pick them up early and as soon as we can. This could also be our chance to take out a portion of the Trooper army and two large transports. We need to protect our allies, and show people we can hold our own against those slimy bastards. 

After a berief moment of consideration, Leia’s mouth lifts into a cautious smile and she turns to face the others, all gathered in a semi-circle around her. “Rey. Chewie. How would you like to lead a rescue mission and make the First Order look like the fools they are?”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I really wanted to explore Rey and Rose's relationship in it's beginning stages, instead of picking up when they are already friends and I'm exited to see where it ends up.  
> Sorry there wasn't any Kylo/Ben in this chapter but we'll be getting a whole lot more of him soon. 
> 
> Thanks for reading. Please let me know what you thought.


	4. Chapter 4

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> “And Poe”, Finn continues, not noticing anything else happening in the cockpit, “Tell Rose to be careful, not to take any dumb risks.” He turns his back on the pilot and copilot chairs and lowers his voice. “Tell her I’m proud of her.” Rey feels her heart falter slightly but keeps her eyes down. 
> 
> After a moment of silence Poe responds, “Will do, Finn. Good luck to you all. Oh, and I’ll be keeping this channel open so that you can communicate with Cellcia if you have any problems. Over and out.” 
> 
> Finn returns the communicator to its slot and then leans up between the seats. “So we about there?” Chewie grunts something under his breath and Rey chuckles.  
> “Actually we are.” Right then they drop suddenly out of hyperspace just above the barren, brown planet of Zadeeom 2.  
> “Hold on, why does this planet look familiar? Oh no!” He straightens up and points an accusatory finger at Chewbacca. “Don’t tell me you’re trying to make me go back to Jakku!”

“Remember, the strike team is scheduled to attack at O400 hours; that means you all have just under two hours to get in there, find the recruits, and get loaded. As soon as we hit those transports, the troopers will be recalled to help fend against the attack, and you will have your chance to get the hell out of there. Don’t stop to look back. Will luck the First Order will be too distracted to even notice you’re making your escape.” 

“We read you, Poe”, Finn grins, “Don’t worry. We’ve got no interest in getting tangled up with Kylo Ren or his men for a second time this week.” Rey’s fingers freeze over the control console where she and Chewie are preparing to drop out of hyperspace and enter Zadeeom 2’s atmosphere. ‘Tangled up with Kylo Ren’, of course, he would use those words exactly. What would they all think if they knew that’s exactly what she had done only days before? Briefly she, again imagines tangling her fingers in those dark curls, his neck so warm under her fingertips. Startled back into reality, Rey glances up to see Chewie cocking his head at her. She quickly returns to her task. 

“And Poe”, Finn continues, not noticing anything else happening in the cockpit, “Tell Rose to be careful, not to take any dumb risks.” He turns his back on the pilot and copilot chairs and lowers his voice. “Tell her I’m proud of her.” Rey feels her heart falter slightly but keeps her eyes down. 

After a moment of silence Poe responds, “Will do, Finn. Good luck to you all. Oh, and I’ll be keeping this channel open so that you can communicate with Cellcia if you have any problems. Over and out.” 

Finn returns the communicator to its slot and then leans up between the seats. “So we about there?” Chewie grunts something under his breath and Rey chuckles.  
“Actually we are.” Right then they drop suddenly out of hyperspace just above the barren, brown planet of Zadeeom 2.  
“Hold on, why does this planet look familiar? Oh no!” He straightens up and points an accusatory finger at Chewbacca. “Don’t tell me you’re trying to make me go back to Jakku!” 

Zadeeom 2 is really nothing like Jakku, although it looks similar from outside its atmosphere, because the entire planet is the same light brown color. A thick fog hangs a few thousand feet in the air and it rains so much there that most of the planet’s surface is a big marsh. The vegetation that grows from the damp soil is nearly translucent, as if made of a murky water or mist. Fine, thin, delicate trees grow only to about six feet tall and little curling shrubs spread across the sand, stretching, and knotting with amongst each other. On the higher ground, on the patches of dry soil where the water doesn’t reach, cities stretch for miles. They go where ever the dry land does, weaving across the land, all connected. The buildings and walls are all built of the rock and bricks the same color of the earth because the trees aren’t strong enough support much weight. But the people are able to eat many parts of the trees and the small animals that also feed off them. It is a solitary place, still, as if stolen out of time. It is a quiet and peaceful place, on an ordinary day. 

\-------------------------

Chewbacca lands the Millennium Falcon at the edge of the city where the distress message came from. Finn had specific instructions on how to find the refugees and how to keep out from the First Order’s clutches. The Falcon is hidden behind a string of buildings and among other ships, but they take care to pull an old cloth tarp across the front half of the very recognizable ship before scurrying into the main city. 

As they enter the gate in the tall wall that surrounds the city, the distant sound of gunfire and screams can be heard. The streets are filled with people, mostly Zadeeomians, short, reddish-brown humanoids with overly long arms, which they walked on. Rey can sense the unease in the crowd and they hurry along their way, darting looks at the others around them. The small group has to push against the flow of traffic because most of the people are headed away from the chaos. In the distant city, two large transport ships hover, casting their long shadows over the people of Zadeeom 2 as the sun begins to get low in the sky. 

Up ahead Rey spots several troopers wading through the crowd, stopping people to ask them questions or pat them down for identification. Even farther ahead, more troopers fill the streets and bang on doors, breaking down the ones with no answer. Rey grits her teeth as she sees two stormtroopers throw an old Zadeeomian man out of his house and into the road. Finn reaches out to grip her wrist, as if to keep her from doing anything crazy. She wants to, but she won’t. She knows their new allies are in much more danger. 

The three of them keep their heads down and thankfully don’t get stopped, though Chewie gets a few lingering looks. They are nearing their destination when a commotion breaks out a few blocks away. A young man and woman were trying to sneak by a group of troopers and were caught. They must have been rebellion supporters because what ever the soldiers found, they didn’t like. The woman tries to run but is shot down. Rey and the others are shoved against a wall as the crowds scatter in terror. The din is almost deafening. Beside her, Finn flinches at the shot that takes out the man as well. Rey sucks in deep breaths, trying to control the rage building inside her. She would kill every one of those troopers right now if she wasn’t on a mission. But she knows justice will be served later when Rose and the other pilots arrive to destroy those transports. 

How can Ben-Kylo Ren stand for this? How could he order this, the slaughter of innocents? In war it is different, one side against the other, fighting to the death. But this isn’t war. They invaded their home and are killing them in their streets. How could a man raised by General Leia and Han Solo stand for this? How could the man she had kissed, the man who had touched her hand and told her she was no longer alone, do this? No. Time after time she continues to be wrong about him. You would think she’d learn. Well now she’s beginning to. 

Across the ally Rey spots the landmark they had been looking for: a tall statue of an old woman in a cloak, head bent above a star carved into her breast. Beside it is an old tavern that’s devoid of visitors and locked up tight. The sign above the door names it as The Rusty Droid. She points it out to Chewie and Finn then leads them in a dash through the panic. 

Rey waits until a large group of troopers surges past to knock on the metal door. The first time gets no response, so she begins to pound the damn thing with her fist. Chewie is about ready to break it down when the door swings inward to reveal a long-snouted, grey man with eight long fingers on each hand. His beard hangs down to his waist and then is parted up into twenty thick braids that he has wrapped his middle to connect to the long braids down his back. He eyes them skeptically after smoothing away his initial frightened expression. He must have been expecting stormtroopers. “We’re closed. I don’t know when we’ll be open again. Go away.” 

Chewie stops the door before he can slam it in their faces and Finn wedges himself in the doorway. “This Wookie gets very angry when he doesn’t get his spirits.” He nods pointedly at Chewbacca, “I’d let the Wookie win.” 

The old man eyes them for another long moment before ushering them inside and locking the door once again. Rey squints around the dark bar room while the old man shuffles around the back of the room. “Thank the Force you got here finally! We all will be executed on the spot unless you get them out of here quickly. Of course, the bloody First Order would come at the beginning of the rainy season. A bad omen. That new Supreme Leader must be in a bad mood to keep preying on peaceful planets.” 

Rey exchanges a glance with Chewie and her heart constricts at the pain she sees there. 

The old man opens up a door and leads them into an underground room. There are nine people in the small space, leaning against the walls or huddled in the corner. They look visibly shaken. A sullen looking man with white blond hair and mustache plunks down his bottle of spirits on a table already full of empty bottles. The room smells dank with the liquor and only intensifies as the man stands and stalks over. “You with the Resistance?” His frown lines deepen as he squints down at Rey and Finn, voice is dark and husky. 

“That’s right”, Finn confirms. 

“I’m Rey, this is Finn, and that’s Chewbacca. We need to get out of here right now!” 

The man nods, “I’m Joel. Tossi’s brother. We’ve been ready.” Joel jerks his head at the others who gather themselves up to go. The old man opens the door and ushers most of the group out. Joel is the second to last out the door, scooting by Rey, Finn, and Chewie with a dark look. Right behind him is a blond young man who pauses to grin at them. His dazzling smile is so startling to look at Rey almost finds it corny. 

“Hey thanks so much for coming to get us! We can’t wait to join the Resistance and fight those nasty cowards! I’m Jayaeum.” He reaches out to grim Finn’s hand and shakes it hard before moving on to Rey. He has dark green, bright eyes and not a blemish on his light skin. He must only be a couple years younger than Rey but doesn’t look it. His enthusiasm takes them all aback. “Oh, you’re Chewbacca!” His eyes grow wide as he nearly shakes Chewie’s arm out of its socket. “You’re the famous war hero. You are my personal hero. I think you deserve a thousand metals for what you did for the galaxy!” Chewie growls appreciatively. “My uncle Joel is especially thankful to you for rescuing us even though he doesn’t act like it.”

“Jayaeum!” From the top of the stairway Joel growls down at his nephew. 

“Oh yeah, we were escaping.” The boy chuckles at himself and then clambers up the steps. 

Up in the bar room, the electronic voices of troopers can clearly be heard from right outside. “Out the back!”, the old man herds them to the back door and flings it open. Joel swipes a few bottles off the bar counter on his way out and Jayaeum thanks the old man profusely before Joel yanks him out by the wrist.  
They make their way down the tiny all behind several houses before having to join the frantic flow of the main street. Jayaeum hangs back and latches himself to Chewie while Finn and Joel lead the way. They group scurries behind some buildings as a heard of troopers pass and Rey leans over to whisper to Jayaeum, “So if Joel is your uncle, Tossi must be your mother?” 

He grins over at her. “Actually Tossi isn’t my Mom. She’s my aunt, though most people assume she’s my mother because… well I guess she’s the famous one. She’s the one who is always leading the raids and things. Not that Uncle Joel isn’t great in a fight, he is; you should see him with a blaster, but he likes to be more behind the scenes.”

They’re back on their feet and into the road again, moving at such a speed that the young man is panting in an effort to continue his thought. “I thought about staying here with Tossi, but I didn’t Joel to be alone. He’s not too good about keeping out of trouble even here with his family, so I figured I’d better go to take care of him. Me and Uncle Joel came here after my parents were imprisoned by the First Order. He and Tossi have been teaching me a lot of things. You know, Tossi can sometimes use the Force.”

“Really?” Rey is shoved up against him hard by two ladies going by at top speed. Her hand automatically goes to the lightsaber at her belt and under her cloak. His eyes follow and his eyes widen. 

Jayaeum steadies her with two strong hands before leaning close, “Are you a Jedi?” 

Rey opens her mouth the reply when she comes up short. Is she a Jedi? She could be if she’d had the proper instruction, but is she now? Can she really claim to be a one of the last of that sacred, legendary religion even though she barely understands it? She knows she’s strong with the Force but… Guilt and uncertainty twists her stomach. “I’m not a master yet, just still learning.” He nods in understanding. 

Suddenly something hits the wall above them. Before they can glance up the top of the wall explodes into large chunks of rock. Debris rains down on Rey and Jayaeum who hunker down. Rey covers her head with her arms as a large rock falls in her direction. She braces for impact, but it never comes. She opens her eyes through the silt in the air and sees the rock hovering over her head and Jayaeum holding his hands out. He is holding it back with the Force. Rey shakily stands up, still starring at him. He flings it aside and grins at her with the hugest one yet. “You have the Force. Where did you learn to do that?” 

He shrugs, “My aunt Tossi taught me.” 

As they continue her eyes follow Jayaeum as he prattles on to Chewie, remembering something he’s said so offhandedly. His parents were imprisoned by the Frist Order and he had to flee with his uncle to some strange world. How can he possibly be this cheerful? He has already softened her heart but now he seems intent to claim it. Maybe she doesn’t have to be alone in her discovery of the force. Maybe they could learn together, if he wants to. Maybe she doesn’t have to face Kylo Ren alone in the end, just as she always thought. 

\-----------------

Rain falls heavily, drenching their little party as they near the place where the Falcon is stashed. The traffic on the streets is getting les and les dense, which means less cover to hide behind. There are also less troopers, but they are far from safety. 

Rey presses up against Chewbacca’s side to whisper to him. Her whole arm is instantly soaked from the rain on his fur. “I’ve got a bad feeling about this, Chewie.” He growls in agreement, eyes darting around. They are so close to the shipyard they can almost see it, but something seems off. 

Suddenly, the two of them bump into the people ahead of them. Finn and Joel, who were talking up at the front a moment ago, grudgingly by Joel, have frozen in their tracks. The shipyard is full of stormtroopers who are checking the i.d. numbers on all the ships. Rey glances down at the time keeper at her wrist and sees they still have a few minutes until the distraction arrives. The rain is falling in earnest now so that visibility isn’t clear. Maybe they can just go unseen for another few moments.  
Just then there’s a voice behind them. “Stop. You there. Show me some identification.” 

Rey’s hand flies to her saber about to whirl and defend them, but a sound echoes out from the other side of city, several explosions and X-wing fighter planes engines. The cavalry has arrived. All the troopers, even those in the yard, are distracted. “Now!” Finn cries, and they run. 

But one of the soldiers must not have been distracted enough by the rain and the attack and the sound of their officers’ orders in their coms. Rey has just taken off when a hand reaches out and wraps around the edge of her cloak. Falling to her knees in the thick mud, she turns to confront her attacker to find none. Jayaeum lies on the ground behind her a scorched blaster bolt hole through his torso. 

Before his face can sink into the slime, Rey lurches forward and rolls him over to lay his head in her lap. Without looking up, she feels the same trooper’s weapon fire straight for her heart. Without knowing how, her hand flies up to halt the bolt in its path. When she looks up, she sees it hanging in the air between them. The trooper is frozen in shock and remains so until that same bolt pierces him in the neck and he falls. 

The rest is a blur. Joel is screaming his nephew’s name. Rey leans down to call Jayaeum back, to press her hands to his wound, but it’s no use. He’s slipping away. The other stormtroopers have become aware of their presence and half attack while the others run away to help the bulk of their army. Finn whips out his blaster and slides through the mud, firing wildly. The others make it to the falcon. Chewie begins to drag Joel after them as he struggles to reach Jayaeum. Rey cups his face and leans in close to tell him to hang on. She is on the edge of hysteria. “You can make it, Jayaeum. Come on.” But there is no use. Blaster bolts wiz around her but she can’t leave him. 

Suddenly Finn is there and pulling her away by her arm. She surrenders and runs with all her might until their safely in the falcon. Chewie takes off alone and jumps straight to lightspeed. 

Joel stares off into space, fists clenched, and brow furrowed, as his friend, a woman with lilac skin and no hair keeps a hand on his shoulder throughout the entire ride back to base. Rey stays folded in on herself in the corner of the main area. Finn just holds her hand. “Poor kid”, is all he says. She can’t keep her eyes off Joel’s face, frozen in pain.

\----------------------

There’s a welcome party waiting when they land in the hangar bay. Leia, Poe, Rose, Cellcia, and a handful of mechanics are there when the ramp lowers. Leia moves forward to greet the first new recruit, but Joel surges out with long strides right past them all. “Those sons of bitches!” He throws a full bottle of liquor against the cement and raises his voice to address the whole bay, “I’ll be needing three blasters, an energy blade, and as much supplies you can give me. Then be on my way.” Leia takes a step back, clearly confused. 

Finn and the rest of the recruits follow right behind him. “Hey man. I know you know want to take them down. And we will, together.” Finn reaches out a hand as if to calm him. Joel shakes his head and kicks the ground, chest heaving. “I’m going to the First Order and kill them all one by one until I get to that bastard Hux and then all the rest down to that Supreme Leader, but that sill won’t be enough for him to avenged.” There are tears in her eyes. 

“Listen, you can’t go alone-.”

“You don’t understand. They recognized me. That’s how they got him. I should have know they would find me and that he would pay for it.” 

“That’s not fair”, his purple friend insists. “We are all wanted, it could have been any one of us. 

“No”, he’s yelling again, “You know it was me. I was a bloody stormtrooper who stole their prized ship and never stopped stealing from them for the past thirty years. I am one of their most wanted fugitives! Of course, they recognized me!” Joel’s chest collapses in on itself and he wraps his arms around himself. Tears streak down his cheeks and drip onto his already damp clothes. “It is my fault. I was supposed to take care of him. I promised Maylaya right before they executed her. I promised I would protect her son.” 

Finn edges closer to look Joel in the eyes. “Listen. I was a stormtrooper too. I also escaped. I know you’re in pain, but I also know he would never want you to put yourself in danger. You would get yourself killed if you went alone. We are going to destroy the Frist Order, everyone of us here, and we’re going to need you too. We will avenge him and everyone else they have taken from us. Alright?” 

Joel closes his eyes for a moment and swallows his sobs, then nods. From his belt he slides one of the stolen bottles and pulls the cork. “For Jayaeum.” He takes a long swig and then passes the bottle to Finn who also drinks to Jayaeum. 

“Let me take you somewhere to rest.” 

As Finn leads Joel away, he asks, “So, you were a trooper too?” 

\-------------------------

Rey pulls off her boots and sinks down onto the edge of her bed. Exhaustion floods her limbs and head. All she sees is Jayaeum’s dark eyes fighting to stay open and rain droplets caught in his lashes. She presses the heals of her hands to her eyes and takes a long, shuddering breath. Then she feels it; that presence. He is here. 

Slowly her eyes open to reveal Kylo Ren sitting across the room from her, shoes also removed and hair askew. Perhaps if she had any energy she would fly at him, but she’s too exhausted and confused. There is no emotion in her gaze as she stares at him. 

He speaks first, a little hesitantly. “Long day?” 

That spikes her temper. As if he doesn’t know- “Shut up, you bastard.”

Kylo shifts backward, taken aback by her hostility. “If you wish. It seems day to day I can never predict your emotions.” 

“Are you sure you couldn’t predict my emotions today?”

“No. I haven’t seen you since two days ago.” 

“You can stop pretending now.”

“I’m not sure I know what you’re alluding to. I don’t know why you are so any all of a sudden.” 

“Oh, I don’t know. Maybe it’s because I watched a boy die in my arms today. I watched your soldiers gun people in the street. Maybe that’s why I’m angry, Ren.”

“What are you talking about?”

“Don’t!”

He’s on his feet now, striding forward. There is urgency in his tone. “What are you talking about?”

“I’m talking about the attack on the innocent citizens of Zadeeom 2 that you ordered.” 

Kylo snaps his jaw closed and clenches his fist. He turns away from her to consider the information she has given him. 

“They killed a young man right in front of me, Kylo! They almost killed me several times. How do expect me to feel?”

His neck snaps around to look at her, anger flashing in his eyes. “I didn’t order that attack, Rey. I had no knowledge of it until now.”

“What?”

He grinds his jaw and glares at some spot on the floor. “Hux must have done this behind my back.” 

Rey is surprised at the anger she feels rippling across his skin and in his core. Hatred for Hux burns there. Before this she hadn’t realized how much Kylo despised the man. Now Kylo looks furious enough to rip him apart with his bare hands. She shakes her head at him. “This shouldn’t be about me. You shouldn’t just be angry that I was almost harmed, but that all of those people were.”

“I am angry that Hux went behind my back. That little piece of scum! And, yes, I would not have ordered the men to just kill people for no reason. That is how Hux works.” He sees Rey still glaring at him in distrust and shakes his head. “Despite what you may think, I do not want my subjects to hate me. I want them to respect and fear my judgement, but not hate me. Don’t kill people just because I can. I actually do try to be a good Leader.” 

“The problem isn’t the leader, it’s the system. If you really wanted to do the right thing, you would be to have the First Order destroyed.”

Kylo cocks his head. “That’s just your opinion. How can you say the leader means nothing? The leader is everything. I am the leader the First Order needs.”

Rey presses her fingertips to her forehead and then runs them through her hair. “Then why has nothing changed? How are you any better than Snoke?” 

He doesn’t have an answer, so he just keeps lips pressed into a tight line; starring her down, but with no real conviction. In his eyes she sees fear, like Ben Solo, so long buried, gazing out from out from the prison of the man who has now taken over. 

“I’m too tired to argue with you, Ren. Just leave me.” 

Kylo closes himself off from her and soon disappears from sight, but somehow a presence lingers. It is soft and so warm and very different from the one that just departed, yet feels so familiar. Perhaps it is Ben Solo, lingering where Kylo Ren is not welcome. As she lies down, Rey folds into in, curling in on herself. She shouldn’t, but she wants it to stay until she is asleep, a last comfort. 

Rey cries only a little saying goodbye Jayaeum in her mind. She had hoped they would discover the ways of the Force together, that she would have someone who truly understands what she’s going through. But, now he’s gone, just like Ben Solo. Just like Luke. Just like Han. Just like her pitiful, nothing parents. 

Ben Solo’s presence does stay with her until she falls, willingly, into a dreamless sleep.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I had no idea I would get so attached to these side characters as I did. 
> 
> Seriously though, Chewie deserves all the metals for putting up with Solos and Skywalkers all these years. I feel like he's such an under appreciated character so I really wanted to have a lot of him in this story. He is one of my favorites. I also wanted to explore his relationship with Rey further, as I hope they do in Episode 9. 
> 
> They better have a Ben/Chewie reunion next movie or else JJ may be at risk of serious injury!
> 
> Thanks for reading. Please let me know what you liked.


	5. Chapter 5

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Rey rolls away from the door and slings an arm across her eyes, trying to block out the rest of the droid’s words. The hum is actually quite soothing, and she’s almost fallen back to sleep when there’s a long silence. “Excuse me, Miss Rey? I fear you may be ignoring my insights. Perhaps I should go and get Master Finn to wake you again. That water seemed quite effective.”
> 
> Rey yanks the door open to glare at the golden droid. “Meet me in the library in twenty minutes, 3PO. You can start working on the next few pages.”   
> “If you insist.”
> 
> She watches him stiffly waddle down the hallway. His voice drifts back to her as he mumbles to himself. “She was the one who asked me to wake her, the least she can do is-.”
> 
> Rey sighs, rolls her eyes at the ceiling, and slams the door behind him.

Wallowing in the golden light of the late morning streaming through her window, Rey wakes to the rap of metal knuckles at the door to her room. Barely able to drag one eyelid open, she calls out in a raspy voice. “Who is it?” 

After a moment of silence, an accented voice answers her. “Yes. Miss Rey. It is I, C-3PO. I cleared my schedule with the General and am here promptly at o-eleven-hundred hours just as you instructed. It is not in my programing to arrive late to an engagement. Though I often prefer to arrive just slightly early, as that-.”

Rey rolls away from the door and slings an arm across her eyes, trying to block out the rest of the droid’s words. The hum is actually quite soothing, and she’s almost fallen back to sleep when there’s a long silence. “Excuse me, Miss Rey? I fear you may be ignoring my insights. Perhaps I should go and get Master Finn to wake you again. That water seemed quite effective.”

Rey yanks the door open to glare at the golden droid. “Meet me in the library in twenty minutes, 3PO. You can start working on the next few pages.”   
“If you insist.”

She watches him stiffly waddle down the hallway. His voice drifts back to her as he mumbles to himself. “She was the one who asked me to wake her, the least she can do is-.”

Rey sighs, rolls her eyes at the ceiling, and slams the door behind him. 

The library isn’t really a library at all. When the remnants of the Resistance moved into the rundown base a few months ago, they had used most of the storage rooms for working or as living quarters. They had used a room nearby the main command central as a place to store old equipment and data consoles. Rey and 3PO had started meeting in this room while they worked on translating the Ancient Jedi Texts. She had finally decided to store the Texts there permanently, so people had taken to calling it the Library. 

Behind the stacks of rusting equipment, Rey and her new assistant had found a quiet place to work in peace. It’s quite cozy actually, and she doesn’t have to worry about the pressures of everyone expecting her to actually be a Jedi and do Jedi things. She can just be herself. With all this junk and the smell of old metal, she could still be back on Jakku in her AT-AT home. It is comforting but also saddening. 

C-3PO already has several of the Sacred Texts and data pads laid out on their usual work table when she arrives, dressed and hair smoothed and tucked back into a bun. He has a page already translated and reads it to her as she carefully analyzes each word. 

Rey leans back in her chair as 3PO reads in a steady rhythm. It is relaxing, but if she’s honest with herself, a bit boring. She gets what the Texts are saying, but more often than not, she doesn’t really understand what it actually means. Does it mean just what it’s saying, or in there another meaning? Is that a metaphor? It that a metaphor for a metaphor? Is she really supposed to clear her mind and only focus on the Force all the time, or just sort of let the Force be a guiding presence in everything she does throughout the day? Is she wrong for wondering and questioning the texts? Rey has no experience to go off of.

“And this is where the concept of the Prime Jedi (sometimes called the Grey Jedi) was first discovered. Then Jedi Master Jekerio took a new apprentice-.”

Rey sit up suddenly in her chair. “Hang on! Go back. What was that about the Prime Jedi? That sounded important.”

3PO scans the page again. “It just says here the concept was discovered at that time. It gives no explanation.”

Narrowing her eyes, Rey frowns. “That term sounds familiar. Haven’t we read about it before?”

The droid takes a moment to scan his internal memory. “Ah yes. There were only three references in the texts we have covered so far. Grey Jedi was mentioned only once.”

“What was the definition? What did it say about the concept?”

“I’m afraid there was none.” 3PO cocks his head sadly. “This term was only mentioned out of context with no explanation whatsoever.” 

Rey growls in frustration and jumps to her feet, where she starts pacing in the cramped space. “Could they not make it easy for me at least once? She drops back into her seat. “That sounds really important. Prime Jedi; like perfect Jedi? Isn’t that something I should be?” C-3PO has no answers to her many questions. “Help me scan the other texts to see if we can fins any other references.”

After a half hour of pouring over the delicate pages, they have found nothing. Rey shakes her head and runs a hand through her hair. If only there were someone who knew what they were doing to help her. Briefly, she wonders if Kylo knows about the Grey Jedi. “I miss Luke”, she sighs. 

“Agreed, Miss Rey, I wish Master Luke were here. Or even Master Obi Wan or Master Yoda. They would be able to help you far better than I am able to.” Rey reaches out to lay her hand on top of his cold metal one. She knows he can’t feel it, but perhaps somehow it is comforting. “Even General Leia, who was never trained, would be better assistance than I am. I’m fluent in over six thousand languages. If only I were fluent in ancient Jedi principles.”

“You’re doing your best, 3PO. Thank you for helping me.” She takes another of the volumes from the stack and smooths open the first page. “Let’s look a little longer before we move on.” The droid leans over to scan the page and begin translation. “Maybe I’m just not meant to know what a Prime Jedi is.”

“Prime Jedi.” 

The pair look up to see Poe Dameron swaggering through the doorway. “That sounds important.”

“I know”, Rey says throwing up her arms. “That’s exactly what I thought.” 

Poe cracks a smile at her obvious annoyance. “So, what is it?”

“We don’t know. That’s what we can’t figure out. The texts keep bringing it up but won’t tell us anything about it!”

“Very inconsiderate.” 3PO agrees. 

Poe plops down beside Rey and braces his hands behind his head. “I can tell.” He looks at the book. “Maybe I can help.”

“You know about the Jedi codes and principles?” Rey is more than skeptical. 

“No. But, I did grow up around General Leia. I even met Luke Skywalker a couple times. I may have an idea or two.”

Rey hands him the book and laughs when he looks at it upside down. “I doubt it. All it says is that the Prime Jedi is also called the Grey Jedi.”

All of a sudden, all of the air seems to be sucked out of the room and Rey’s senses are lazes focused on a place straight ahead of her. A breath echoes in her ears. Then Kylo Ren appears in a place where there was only empty air. 

Rey’s body goes still, but the others don’t notice because they are trading ideas. She can barely hear them, almost forgets they are with her, until Poe places a hand on her shoulder. 

“Rey? You alright?”

Slowly she forces a breath and rips her gaze away from Kylo’s. “Yes. I’m fine.”

Kylo raises an eyebrow. They had never been connected while either of them had company. “Who is with you?”

Poe is trying to take the book back from 3PO and laughing when the golden droid swats him away. 

“Poe.” Rey both answers Kylo’s question and calls Poe’s attention. 

Kylo nods in understanding. 

“What?” Poe drops his arms and frowns at her sharp tone. 

“Give me the book, 3PO.” He does.

“The droid too?” Kylo raises his eyebrows skeptically. “What was that about the Prime Jedi? Why are you discussing such a topic with the likes of these two?”

Rey’s eyes never leave his face as she talks to the other two. “We need to search the Texts and find out what a Prime Jedi is. Help me.” 

Lifting his chin, Ren considers her with narrowed eyes. “The Texts? The Sacred Texts? You have them; how could you possibly?”

She gives her head a slight shake in response. 

“The droid is helping you with translation, but you don’t understand them.”

“You know his name!” Glaring, Rey snaps. 

“What?” Poe looks up in confusion. 

“Nothing just thinking.” 

Kylo bites in inside of his lip. “I do know his name. My Grandfather created him.” Rey rolls her eyes. “Why are you so interested in the Prime Jedi? 

She shakes her head and Ren taps his fingers against his knee. “I don’t blame you. It’s an interesting concept.” 

So he does know. It makes sense because he attended Luke’s Jedi school and apprenticed under him. He probably understands everything in these texts. The idea annoys her. She lifts her eyebrows expectantly at him. 

Instead, Poe answers while Kylo just watches her with interest. “It is also called the Grey Jedi? Hmmm. Maybe, by grey it means old. The best Jedis are the old and grey because they have the most knowledge and experience. Therefore, Prime Jedis are the elder Jedis.” Poe looks very pleased with himself and Rey can’t help but grin at his enthusiasm. 

“Good idea, Poe, but I don’t think the Prime Jedi has anything to do with age.” Out of the corner of her eye she sees Kylo shake his head. 

“No, indeed”, 3PO agrees, raising an arm in emphasis. “Perhaps it has more to do with the nature of the individual. Could grey be referring to a morally grey motivation or intention?” 

This seems to be more on the right track. “Maybe a morally grey motivation or intention?” She repeats as she turns to face Kylo Ren. His eyebrows lift in approval. 

“You’re not wrong. You know there is a light side and a dark side of the Force? The Force cannot exist without both, but they are constantly at odds. Each wants to be stronger than the other, but neither can remain victorious for very long because the other rises up to take its place. It is a constant struggle; a never-ending cycle of light and dark. This is why the galaxy can never be at peace. You know there are users of both sides?”

Rey had dropped her eyes back to the table, so not to look suspicious, but nods yes to his question. 

Kylo leans forward, elbows on knees, and then continues. “The Jedi pull their power from the light side and the Sith pull from the dark. There are some who don’t join either order and are just referred to as Dark-side users and Light-side users. You are on your way to becoming a Jedi, but I am not a Sith.”

Surprized, Rey glances up in curiosity. She’d never thought about it that way before. There was only the Jedi and the Sith, no in-between. But it makes sense. She had always thought of Kylo as a Sith Apprentice, not just a Dark-side user. 

“What?” He asks after she’s been staring at him for far too long. Rey shakes her head imperceptibly and he continues. “The Jedi of old came up with a mold for the ideal Jedi: the Prime Jedi. This is not a normal Jedi.” Rey lifts her head, transfixed by this new information. “This Jedi was very unconventional and most Masters opposed the idea. Others agreed that it was right, but never practiced the principal. Those few who did either left the order or were forced out.”

“So what is the Prime Jedi?” She doesn’t care that Poe and the droid can hear; she needs answers. Kylo leans in even closer and so does Rey. Eyes wide and heart racing, she waits for her first real answer. 

All of a sudden, Kylo breaks their intense eye contact and his eyes flit up to some spot above her head. He clears his throat and continues to stare. Ren must have a visitor of his own. He nods curtly and then returns his gaze to hers. “Search your feelings Rey”, he whispers, “You will find the answers you are looking for.”  
Then he stands up straight and marches past her, his fingers and edge of his flowing cape brushing her shoulder. Rey shivers. She doesn’t have to turn around to know that he has disappeared. 

What a strange encounter, she thinks to herself, then notices both C-3PO and Poe starring at her. 

“Rey, what’s going on.” Poe asks slowly and cautiously, looking at her like she might be crazy. 

“Nothing”. She tries to smooth back her tumultuous feelings. “I’m just thinking… and I’m really frustrated because of all of this. She gestures at the work splayed out before them. “Thanks for your help, but I’m not sure I’ll ever figure it out.”

Poe pats her on the back. “Hey, I’m sure you’ll get it. You’re amazing with the Force. All you need is a break to clear your head. Actually, the reason I came down here was to ask you to have lunch with me. Rose and Finn are out on that training exercise, so I didn’t want to eat alone. Maybe we can make it before they run out of the good gravy. Come on!”

Rey chuckles as Poe grabs her hand and tugs her to her feet. C-3PO begins stacking the Sacred Texts while Poe rushes her out the door. “Thanks 3PO”, Rey calls back. 

“How odd these young people are.” He murmurs with a sigh. “I should have stayed on Tatooine.”

Brain to exhausted to do anymore thinking, Rey gathers her staff, lightsaber, and training supplies from her quarters and heads to the combat room. There are only a couple people training inside when she arrives, so she’ll have her corner to herself. 

When they first set up residence in the base, they set up a combat training room out of a long, low room with metal walls. There is a target practicing range, a sparing mat, and a row of dummies to punch. Since no one is trained with a staff or saber, Rey spends most of her time in the corner with the dummies and has even claimed it as her own. It is quiet and free of distractions. 

As she walks down the line of dummies, she reads the white words scrawled across their chests. Weeks ago, a few of the resistance members had the brilliant idea to paint each of the dummies with a name of someone they wanted to defeat. They guessed, correctly, that it would be a good motivation for people to spend more time in the combat room. Most of the names belong to high ranking First Order officials or specific Stormtroopers that have been a particular annoyance. At least two of them are labeled “General Hux”, and Phasma and Snoke are also featured. 

Rey flinches as she passes a dummy branded “Kylo Ren. Later on, the words “Supreme Leader” in quotations were added above his name. If she were brave enough, she would spar against that one; but she finds herself wanting to keep as much distance as possible between her and it. Instead, Rey parks herself in front of her usual Snoke. 

Shedding her wool vest, Rey is finally able quiet her mind and release all the energy and frustrations building in her system. It feels amazing. It is just her and her staff and her abilities. The smack of staff on rubber is more than satisfying as she taps one side of the head, switches positions and then hits the other side. The rhythm and repetition is relaxing and she looses herself in it. 

An hour later, Rey takes a quick water break. She slides down against the wall, sweaty and burning up, and lays the staff across her lap. After gulping down half a canteen of water, she pulls her lightsaber out of her bag and stares at it. Rey doesn’t have much chance to train with it because it would cut straight through anything it touches. She is losing progress with it but progressing with staff. It is difficult to carry both into battle with her. Her gave falls to the staff. If only were smaller, more compact. Maybe she can tinker around with it later and see it there is a way create retractable pieces like the saber has. 

The puzzle of the Prime Jedi returns to her mind and stays the rest of the day. Kylo had told her to search her feelings to find the answer. She does as he suggested and is beginning to understand. The Prime Jedi is called Grey because she/he draws her power exclusively from the dark or the light side; but both. 

This concept goes against everything she thought she knew, but she’ll need to think more about it before forming an opinion. There is a lot to unpack. 

As she lays in her bed at night, Rey’s mind wanders to thoughts of Kylo Ren. Why is she unable to keep him out of her head? The Force has a cruel sense of humor, she decides. Of course, it would unbreakably bond her with her sworn enemy. She is so desperate for the companionship of another Force user, but she must never accept who the Force has given her. 

Suddenly she remembers something 3PO had said earlier in the day: “Even General Leia would be or more assistance than I am.” That gives her an idea. Maybe the General would be able to help her understand some of the things she’s been confused about. She was Luke’s sister and Ben is her son. She must know something of the Force and the Jedi. 

Rey has no idea what she’ll say, but this is the only option. She decides it’s about time to pay Princess Leia a visit.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> C-3PO is probably my favorite droid because he's just so funny and loyal. Sure, he can be a pain sometimes, but you try following Skywalkers around for generations. I really wanted to have Rey develop a relationship with all the other characters, not just Ben, like Poe and C-3PO. I had so much fun!
> 
> Ever since I heard of the Prime Jedi, I've been interested in the idea and what it could mean for our favorite star-crossed lovers. I want Rey to discover the secret over time. Next chapter things really pick up in the romance department and I can't wait! Stand by for beautiful Reylo cuteness. 
> 
> Thanks for reading! Please let me know what you thought!


End file.
